Author’s Note: Short post & Names have been changed.

I’ve never smoked marijuana myself but have been in the room with other people when they’ve smoked it plenty of times and from what I’ve been told, the “passive high” I got from time-to-time was nothing like the one you get when you’re the one smoking it.

Thank the gods!

One of my biggest fears in life is losing control of my mental faculties, my “self”. This is one of the biggest motivating factors behind my not ever having drunk alcohol or done any drugs—I simply cannot risk it.

The risk is there in my mind, that I would enjoy one-or-the-other too much like my father, so I’ve just avoided that mentality altogether.

Living with Marty didn’t leave me much option to avoid being around a room full of smoke. To his credit, he did try to smoke most of the time in our toilet so the exhaust fan would get rid of much of the smoke. However there were a few times that he smoked on the couch beside me and the strength of his hydro-leaf was just staggering. (Smelling it before it was lit was enough!)

Anyway, one such time that I remember is when we were watching Freddy Got Fingered (herein referred to as FGF)—a Tom Green film for anyone wondering, so it’s probably as bad as you were imagining!

For those who don’t know, Tom Green is an insane comedian from Canada whose particular style of comedy hasn’t really endeared him to a great many people that aren’t stoners or don’t have a really left-field sense of humour. He was married to Drew Barrymore for a while but I think she went slightly insane and escaped as soon as she could…

But I digress. The night we hired out FGF, he smoked on the couch. We both got pretty happy, (him way more than I), and giggled out arses off at this ridiculously crass and vulgar movie.

At about the third time through the film (we watched it repeatedly from about 6pm when we ate dinner to around 7am the next morning…) I noticed something a little strange…and it scared the hell out of us in the state we were in!

There is a scene in the film in which Gordy (Tom’s character) drives up in his convertible and parks outside the cartoon animation studio he’s trying to get a T.V. show with. As he pulls up, I noticed that there’s a model shark in his car, just riding alongside him. It was one of the strangest things we’d seen (at the time) and simply wasn’t explained at all in the film or the special features.

I got all conspiratorial and thought it was something they put in intentionally to freak out stoners, and I maintain that to this day! It’s something that I reckon Tom would have put in cos he thought it was funny.

Anyway, when we finally crashed and slept through that day, I had the most screwed up dreams! I think the both of us had nightmares, probably spurred on by each other’s sleep-talking scared-ness.

Marijuana aside, Tom Green is probably enough to give anyone nightmares. I, personally, find him funny (sometimes) but I can definitely understand why most people just plain cannot stand him…